Your SO OF COURSE preview of WWE WrestleMania 36!By Matthew Martin| April 3, 2020 WWE Blogs In this day and age, you can’t just “predict” a PPV anymore, you have to account for the capricious whims of WWE’s septuagenarian, sleep-deprived egomaniac owner. You can’t just “preview” a PPV…you have to preview how things should go, in a reasonable and sane world, and then add “so of course…” and explain what Vince McMahon will probably do instead. Last time on SO OF COURSE, it was… Your SO OF COURSE preview of WWE Elimination Chamber 2020! That was less than a month ago. Since then the whole world has basically stopped turning and wrestling, in particular, has been thrown into an upheaval the likes of which we’ve never seen before, at least not in the modern, TV era. WrestleMania is this weekend but it doesn’t feel like it. For one thing, the show’s already been secretly recorded, with many of the matches being gimmicked up and others being “traditional” in-ring bouts held at the crowd-less WWE Performance Center. Up is down, in is out, nothing makes sense. It’s chaos out there so who knows what’s going to happen. WrestleMania, in some form or another, is this Saturday and Sunday. Sixteen matches in all, with no word from the company as to what the respective cards will look like other than the basic rundown of matches. So if that’s all we have to work with, let’s work with it, and try and predict all the ways Vince can screw up an already-screwed up show. This is your SO OF COURSE preview of WWE WRESTLE IS OUT THIS IS COVID-19 MANIA BABY AND IT’S RUNNING WILD MANIA 36!… Night #1 OTIS vs DOLPH ZIGGLER What is it? It’s Dolph Ziggler’s first WrestleMania solo match…ever. The man’s been working for the company for nearly fourteen years. He’s been a tag, US, IC, World champion multiple times over and he’s only now in a solo match…and it’s against Otis. Do I care? Nah. Will it be good without a crowd? No, Otis only works when he’s got a crowd to feed off of. Likewise, Ziggler is at his best when he’s bumping around the ring, but half of the fun of that is hearing the crowd react to it. Put these two in a performance center match and, like much of this two-night show, it will only expose the weaknesses of the sport. Who should win? Otis, because there’s an actual storyline here and WrestleMania is the place where storylines are supposed to resolve. SO OF COURSE ALEISTER BLACK vs BOBBY LASHLEY What is it? Filler for two guys that had nothing better to do. Do I care? Do you? Does anyone? Bobby Lashley is a black hole of caring about this stuff. Will it be good without a crowd? Would it even be good with a crowd? Who should win? Black is on an upward trajectory. Lashley is just here to keep other companies from hiring him. Black should win in a walk. SO OF COURSE THE STREET PROFITS vs AUSTIN THEORY & ANGEL GARZA What is it? A tag title match I guarantee Vince doesn’t even know is on the card. Do I care? More than Vince. I can see this match being a lot of fun. Will it be good without a crowd? The Street Profits will lose a bit without the audience cheering them on, but everyone’s athleticism should make for a fun five minutes or however long they’re given to work with. Who should win? The Street Profits are a team good enough to build a division around. SO OF COURSE BAYLEY vs LACEY EVANS vs NAOMI vs SASHA BANKS vs TAMINA What is it? Four women with nothing better to do, two of whom have no reason to be here. Do I care? Maybe if the opening ten seconds feature Lacey Evans and Tamina running into each other, head first, like a couple of angry bulls, knocking themselves out, and turning this into the triple threat it was supposed to be. Will it be good without a crowd? It’s tough to say. Sasha and Naomi are great at working the crowd (in different ways), whereas Tamina and Lacey are great at boring crowds. So that’s a wash. Bayley and Sasha cut their teeth in front of almost no one in Full Sail so they can probably get by, but there’s enough dead weight in this match to bring it down no matter how many aren’t watching. Who should win? Naomi, if only to move the title scene in a new direction. SO OF COURSE GOLDBERG vs BRAUN STROWMAN What is it? It’s Goldberg vs Roman Reigns, sans Roman Reigns. Do I care? Oh heck no. Will it be good without a crowd? hahaha Who should win? I don’t care if Goldberg was going up against Gronk, Goldberg needs to drop the strap and walk away. SO OF COURSE JOHN CENA vs THE FIEND What is it? It’s WrestleMania 30 only far far worse. Also, it’s going to be a Firefly Funhouse Match, but don’t get excited. Do I care? I still remember the months-long humiliation that Cena handed Bray Wyatt in 2014. I’d like to believe that things are different now: Cena is semi-retired, Bray just dropped the belt and thus needs a win, but this is still John Cena and Bray Wyatt. I want to care but I also know not to get too excited. Will it be good without a crowd? Do you remember the Randy Orton vs Bray Wyatt House of Horrors match a few February’s ago? Imagine that but with John Cena. Who should win? Obviously Bray needs a win here more than anyone else on the PPV. SO OF COURSE EDGE vs RANDY ORTON What is it? It’s probably the only match anyone cares about on this card. Do I care? I am part of “anyone,” so yes. Will it be good without a crowd? Sadly, no. Randy Orton isn’t much even with a crowd, and take away the excitement of the audience to Edge’s return match and you’re looking at what will probably be the biggest let down of the night. People are hoping this main-events the show but I think when it’s over everyone will just lament at how a potentially great WrestleMania match was the biggest causality of the whole change in venue. Who should win? Edge is the only right call here since he’s coming back, presumably for more than one night only and needs to reassert himself. Orton is more than capable of absorbing a WrestleMania loss. There’s no need to overthink this. SO OF COURSE BECKY LYNCH vs SHAYNA BASZLER What is it? It’s the only reasonable main-event match of night one. Do I care? Yeah. A lot of people were ready to write this off as a busted feud a month ago, but now I think it might be the sleeper of the whole weekend. Will it be good without a crowd? Becky Lynch exudes enough charisma to get by without a live crowd. Shayna Baszler’s character and wrestling style doesn’t need an audience either. These two are just going to fight and it’s probably going to be rad. Who should win? Shayna Baszler, if only to justify her call-up from NXT and to give Becky Lynch something new to work with for a change. On the other hand, how do you do a “regime” change without a live crowd booing the change? Wrestling without a crowd is just so wrong. In this case, I’d keep the title on Becky and do a rematch later this year when everything (hopefully) is back to normal. Handing “the man” a loss like this in such a wasted show feels wrong. SO OF COURSE
