The Redman Report: WWE Smackdown 18/3/11: Awesomeness w/ added MattVP!

Long story short, I was bored today so in looking for something to watch I stumbled upon Matt Hardy vs MVP from a Smackdown in 2007, which just so happens to be the very first match of the epic MattVP saga. So, an old Smackdown TV match…my Smackdown report…why not talk about it here? BUT, not before I talk about an awesome, fantastically retro, every-single-thing-was-great-for-2-hours Smackdown.

Booker’s FACE when Cole came out made Cole coming out worth it.

Edge vs Brodus was an impossibly good 5 minute match. This was so much fun. Booker was great being allowed to commentate normally, Brodus was a big bad dude, and Edge had to use his speed and experience and Edge-ness to counter. Loved Edge not being able to use his arm for the DDT and so on. Shenanigans and the finish were fun, but then Christian and Alberto kicking the CRAP out of each other was awesome. INSIDE A STEEL CAGE! Well, buyrates and stipulations and blah blah, but man, that is so gonna rule the world of professional wrestling.

KOFI’S BACK! I have no idea what on earth he’s done to upset the office, other than become the (former) Greatest Man in the Entire World, but whatever. And boy is he ever back, WHAT A MATCH. It was only 6 minutes so it only whetted my appetite for more Kofi, but this was so great. Lots of cool counters and hard shots, plus some of the Workrate Greatest Hits like kicking the stairs into the guy’s knee. Finish was a bit abrupt but it made sense, and man that was some good fun. I NEED MORE KOFI.

I absolutely love how the logical progression in the Kane/Show angle, after both guys hit the other with chairs for 2 weeks, is for them to team up together and Kane saying “You complete me.”

Trent! This is a hell of a show so far. Wait, WHERE’S SMOKE AND MIRRORS?! Bad, BAD decision, the new music is terrible. Cody was a badass though coming out in the towel, then snapping and murdering Trent with headbutts. Still the Greatest Man in the Entire World. Could have done without Booker/Cole though.

WOAH-OH, you’re only smoke and mirrors tonght 🙁

And now LAYCOOL. This is the best hour of TV in forever, I swear. Commentary has died since the first match though. Fun match. Layla looks unreal. Like, she cannot be real. Cannot say enough how glad I am they’ve abandoned this idea of breaking up two people who love each other into forever and ever. At least until after Wrestlemania anyway.

OK, OFFICIALLY the best hour of TV in forever and ever. What a great angle. Cant believe I got so into Show/Kane and Corre. It was a fun little match, while it was one – best bit was Slater tagging in for the first time and running right into an UPPERCUT. Kane was murdering these guys with these punches. Barrett doing Wasteland on Show was MENTAL. As was Show’s bad bump on the table. How it didnt break under the weight of the BIG SHOW I’ll never know.

Anyway, to me the great thing about this was the swerve. Not a SWERVE~ swerve, but just doing something different from what you expected going in. From the minute they teamed up you assume that they’ll just run right over these guys and win the titles tonight and we go from there, and during the whole match they were. Even after the DQ you expect them to clean house, you know? But instead Corre beat the crap out of them in this brutal, Nexus-ish beatdown. So now the new story is  “Woah, Corre totally ruined their reunion”, and the heels have their heat back. Great stuff.

And now Chris Masters! This is one of THOSE Smackdown episodes, where the awesome never ends. Anyway, Masters is out here on Smackdown so get your e-money out for this match going about 1:50-1:55, and it being great. And there you go – 1:55 on the dot, and it was great. Amazing. Cole was an ultra great Cole here too.

And then Rey! Ahaha, again. What heels are there left on Smackdown? Wait, Drew! Man, if they have a 12 minute rematch I’m going to start shrieking and dancing around the room a little.

Ahh, bugger, its only Ted. Still, should be good. I dont think the Nakamura rope run will ever not be cool. Surprised this only got 5 minutes, but it was a good 5 minutes with some good counters, and its the best Ted has looked in a long while.

They did a good job recapping Raw is Snooki with all of the mainstream press they got. Also, for no earthly reason, in the Wrestlemania card rundown Alberto is wearing a Ric Flair robe. Its the weirdest thing.

Man, these guys are great. Alberto coming out all pissy, he tried to do his big smile but it just became a grimace because its like “Crap, I’m having a cage match.” And Christian just came out like “‘Imma get my hands on this dude” like a great babyface. WOAH SUPER SAMOAN DROP. That was brutal. SUPER STEP UP ENZIGURI! The armbar roll into the Killswitch was cool too. Good match. Finish was kind of strange, if the idea was Alberto’s arm was stuck they didnt sell it very well.

So here’s Alberto peed off after losing a grudge match in a cage, going to beat the crap out of Christian anyway, and his best friend Edge, instead of running down to save him from destruction, decides he’d rather jump in Alberto’s car, honk the horn and screw around. You know why? Because he’s an Asshole Babyface, thats why. Edge almost killed the whole serious feel with his BS, but thankfully Brodus saved and Alberto CONCHAIRTO’d the crap out of Edge’s arm like the glorious heel that he is, and we once again have a ball game. Good finish.

But wait, there’s more!

*FLASHBACK to 2007: Matt Hardy & MVP*

Matt Hardy vs MVP (non title), Smackdown 6/7/07

This was INCREDIBLE. Just getting that off my chest from the get go. Completely and utterly incredible. I thought it would be good, but I wasnt ready for this. This was wonderful, just the best kind of 15 minute+ Smackdown TV match with a clean finish that puts over everyone within a mile radius.

They started off chain wrestling, just working holds, and even in the rest of the match there were no fancy spots, no theatrics, just all basics, and it was great. Here and through the entire match there’s this feeling of “I’m a better wrestler than you, and I shall beat you.” This totally came off like a sporting contest between two very good athletes. Unlike most matches, nobody had the upper hand for more than a moment, because the other guy was just that good that he couldnt be kept down. For example, MVP saw Matt land on his knee and went after it. In any other match thats the signal for the heel to take the guy down and work the leg for 5 minutes, but here Matt was good and quick enough to beat him away and force him to think of something else, to win the hard way. Little things like that got me so excited, and every time I calmed down there was another one. So many great spots. Matt was pounding on MVP in the guard so MVP hit this brutal headbutt from the bottom. MVP threw forearms but Matt blocked them and countered with a clothesline. I am not doing these justice here describing them. You have to watch them and see how they feel. TWO Side Effects couldnt get it done. Neither MVP’s new Chono Kick in the corner. It just built so well, and them BOOM, the babyface beat the champ clean, and you have a feud. Add in JBL (and a perfectly fine Cole) working his ass off putting both guys and the match over, and you have a winner. One of the best matches I’ve watched in forever and ever.

I just cannot, CANNOT overstate how great this match was, how well it was worked. Everything they did worked, everything connected, everything meant something. Like I said, it was a total sporting contest, two guys trying to outwrestle the other, trying to beat the other guy, two evenly-matched athletes. Now, I say over and over, that I’m probably the most pro-“today’s product” person around these parts. But boy, when it was over, blow me down if I didnt sit there thinking “Wrestling just doesnt do it like that anymore.” This was something else.

Since I enjoyed doing that so much, and since it came from a DailyMotion playlist of the entire MattVP angle, I might actually do this every week. Go through the MattVP feud as it unfolded, week by week. Actually, I like this idea already, because it seems that the next week promises some retro Chris Masters!