WWF: St. Valentines Day Massacre 1999 Classic ReviewBy Dan| February 15, 2004 Classic WWF Reviews Crazy, you’re driving me crazy, with your sweet little smile, you’re heartbreak eyes, see right through me hypnotise me, ……………take me, hold be close, but don’t break me ………….blah…..blah, my sweet Valentine” That’s right folks, its Classic WWE review time once again, and this time we are not delving too far back into the wrestling past, only a few years or so, as we go back to February 1999 to look at WWF St. Valentines Day Massacre. Cert: 15 Length: (VHS) 165 mins The entire card looked like this; Matches Steel Cage Match:Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Vince McMahon Last Man Standing Match for the WWF Championship:The Rock vs. Mankind Kane & Chyna vs. Triple H & X-Pac WWF Intercontinental Championship Match – Special referee Billy Gunn:Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis WWF Tag Team Championship Match:Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett vs. Mark Henry and D’Lo Brown. Big Bossman vs. Mideon WWF Hardcore Championship Match:Bob Holly vs. Al Snow Goldust vs. Blue Meanie It was the night that Stone Cold Steve Austin would step in the ring and take on his arch rival Vincent Kennedy McMahon in a steel cage, with a shot at the WWF Championship at Westlemania up for grabs. Everyone knows the story about Mr McMahon and Steve Austin, The Chairman of the WWF had been making Austin’s life hell since Austin captured the WWF Championship from Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemaia 14. McMahon had used the help of Undertaker, Kane and Mick Foley to name a few, but he still struggled to deter Austin from recapturing the WWF Championship. It was time to take matters into his own hands, so in January ‘99, Vince McMahon entered the Royal Rumble and went onto to win it a vicarious fashion with help from his “Corporation”. Following WWF tradition winning the Royal Rumble granted Mr. McMahon a shot at the WWF Championship at Wrestlemania 15, something Steve Austin wanted badly. This all lead up to the match between Austin and McMahon at St. Valentines Day Massacre. Also on the card was the WWF Championship match between Mankind and The Rock . These two had had some brutal matches since The Rock won the WWF Championship at Survivor Series 98. They had fought at “In Your House – Rock Bottom”, they were involved in a brutal “I Quit” match at the Royal Rumble and also fought with one another at “Halftime Heat”, But this time around it would be a Last Man Standing Match . The rivalry was hot, and it was certain that Rock and Mick Foley would put on an exciting and entertaining match. Also the night had mixed tag match with Kane and Chyna of the McMahon’s Corporation taking on Triple H and X-Pac of D Generation X. The question was, would the new alliance of Kane and Chyna be enough to defeat the long and trusted friendship of X Pac and Triple H? So, looking at the card its pretty scary, think about it…………..Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Vince McMahon and Rock vs. Mankind – and then Goldust vs. Blue Meanie and Big Bossman vs., Mideon. I know people say “Variety is the spice of life” but that’s taking it to far, anyway moaning aside the card looked a mixed bag, hopefully the potentially good matches would overcome the poorly booked under-card. Highs and Lows Ok, to kick us off we have a match between Goldust and The Blue Meanie, or to be or more exact a match between Goldust and BlueDust. These two had been going through some feud together, and this match was the culmination of that feud, but I suppose I’m stating the obvious. Anyway, getting to the match in hand, it starts off pretty slow with each guy taunting each other. Action starts up and its pretty slow paced throughout, a few comedy skits and its more or less over. Goldust whips Meanie into the turnbuckle but he escapes. Meanie then fights back and goes for the Moonsualt but misses. Goldust then hit’s the Curtain Call and get the 3 count for the victory. I’m not going to say this match was terrible, because it wasn’t, it was solid wrestling wise. But for an opening match it was terrible, it lacked excitement and for me was a lacklustre affair. To be fair it was a match worthy to be shown on Sunday Night Heat, but nothing else. Do you remember when Bob Holly had thrown the Sparky Plug moniker out the window, and he had yet to become “Hardcore” he was simply known as Bob Holly, well it was at this PPV where Hardcore Holly was born, not that it actually made a bit of difference, but anyway. Holly would be taking on Al Snow in a WWF Hardcore Championship match. The match goes everywhere, out in the backstage area, into the car park and just about everywhere the two men could go. As you can imagine there was little “wrestling” involved , and a lot of brawling and usage of weapons. Both men continued to brawl with one another and the match goes outside of the arena. The fight takes both men down to the river bank and the fight takes to the water. Bob “Nearly Hardcore” Holly gets some wire fencing and beats Snow with it and proceeds to wrap him in it, thus letting him get the 3 count. So it goes, Bob Holly beats Al Snow, he becomes WWF Hardcore Champion, and Hardcore Holly is officially born, how great is that? Anyways, the match was ok, pretty typical WWF Hardcore wrestling, not much “wrestling” a few trash can lids, couple of steel chairs and Bob’s your uncle, or you new Hardcore Champion to be exact. Moving on, obviously someone locked Undertaker and The Ministry out of the arena as they are shown outside or somewhere. Luckily, or maybe not, someone has let them in as Mideon prepares to take on the Big Bossman. Match starts off and to be honest , its pretty horrible stuff. Horrible because its so boring, I suppose both wrestlers as individuals are not too bad, but put together in a match, terrible! Eventually Bossman nails the Bossman Slam on Mideon and he gets the win. Just as the match is over, “BONG!” Taker and his band mates come down to ringside, beat Bossman up and then take him into the back. Bad match because it was so dull. WWF Tag Team Championship Match is up next, as the team of Jeff Jarrett and Owen Hart take on the tag team of Mark Henry and D’Lo Brown. Following the trend of the rest of the PPV this match had something missing, it didn’t feel like a Tag Team Championship match, it just felt like another match from Raw. As you can expect Jarrett, D’Lo and Owen provide solid work, while Mark Henry, is just Mark Henry. The match comes to a pretty quick end when D’Lo who has the advantage goes to the top turnbuckle for the Lowdown, however Debra distracts Brown. Debra and Ivory then get involved in a Catfight, back in the ring, Mark Henry goes on the rampage only to be met with a guitar shot to his knee by Owen thus allowing Jeff Jarrett to hit the Figure Four for the victory. Average match in all ways. No real chemistry between the two teams. Just on a side note, D’Lo Brown & Mark Henry, most talented worker out of the pair? And then who is still employed by McMahon? That’s what called “WWE Sense”. Ok, now, WWF Intercontinental Championship Match, Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis, oh yeah………..Billy Gunn is special referee for this one folks. Basically match came about because Val was “seeing” Ryan Shamrock, Ken’s “sister”, obviously Ken was not best pleased and this is sort of how the match came about. Match starts off ok, with the two exchanging blows and brawling with one another. Shamrock beats down on Val, but Val manages to get back up and he delivers a suplex or two to Shamrock, and he goes for the beat down on Shamrock. Val goes to the outside with Shamrock and throws Shamrock into the turnbuckle. Val works on Shamrock’s back locking him in the camel clutch, but Shamrock fights back. Shamrock manages to hit a DDT on Val, and Billy Gunn goes for the count, Gunn counts 1.…………2.……… but no three, either he has forgot what comes next , or he is screwing with Ken Shamrock. As Ken argues with Billy Gunn, Val goes for a sleeper, but Ken then backdrops Venis. Match continues back and forth , until Ken beats down on Venis and gets in the “Zone”. Shamrock puts Venis into the Ankle lock, Venis crawls to the ropes where Ryan gives him a hand., letting Val get a rope break. Shamrock goes to the outside and argues with Ryan, its here where the “Slap Me” moment occurs. Shamrock gets back in the ring and is met with a roll up by Val Venis, Gunn fast counts as Val becomes the champion. Billy Gunn and Shamrock fight with one another, and while Val celebrates Gunn beats down on Val. Ok, why the need for Billy Gunn?, Take two perfectly decent wrestlers, Val Venis and Ken Shamrock, the match should be ok, so is there a need for Billy Gunn to be involved,? I don’t think so, an ok match, but spoilt by the presence of Billy Gunn as referee. Mixed tag match is up next as Kane and Chyna take on Triple H and X-Pac with Shane McMahon joining King and Cole on the announcing desk. To start us off Tripe H and Kane square off with one another. Kane dominates the start and beats down on Triple H. Trips tags in X-Pac, but again Kane beats down X-Pac. Kane tags in Chyna , and she goes to work on X-Pac. X-Pac fights back and sets Chyna up for the Bronco Buster, however Chyna escapes. Kane is then tagged in and he again goes to work on X-Pac, but X-Pac fights back with punches and kicks. Hunter and X-Pac double team Kane, and then Hunter gets the tag. Kane beats down Triple H and Chya asks for the tag, Kane tags Chyna in and she beats down Triple H. X-Pac Pac is tagged in, and then soon Chyna tags in Kane. DX yet again double team Kane. X-Pac and Kane go to the outside and brawl a little, X-Pac then attacks Shane on the announce table. Match continues in the ring with Chyna and Kane beating down on X-Pac. X-Pac eventually manages to the tag to Hunter while Chyna is in the ring. The match breaks down and Triple H and Kane go toward the back, X-Pac delivers the Bronco Buster to Chyna, and Shane runs in. X-Pac chases after Shane leaving Chyna and Triple H in the ring, Triple goes for the Pedigree, but Kane delivers a Chokeslam to Triple H, pulling Chyna over Triple H so she could get the pinfall. Very good match, all four persons worked solidly and delivered a first rate effort. Only if we could go back to 1999? WWF Championship match now, with The Rock taking on Mankind. Going straight to the match, Mick and Rocky start brawling in the entrance way, exchanging lefts and rights with one another. Rock takes Mick over to a table, where Mick hit’s a DDT on Rocky through the table. Referee starts a 10 count but both men respond. Brawling starts again, and Rock delivers a harsh back drop to Mick on the entrance way. Back in the ring and Mankind goes for his own version of the People’s Elbow, but Rock has it scouted. Action moves to the ring side area where Rock delivers some suplexs. While Mankind is being counted, Rock goes to the announce table and gives some comments , while doing so Mankind pounces on him and beats him down. While Rock is laying flat out on the table, Mick goes to the ring apron and delivers a flying elbow to the back on Rock’s head. Back in the ring, Rock is beaten down in the corner and Mick brings in the steel steps, Mick goes running with the steps but Rock sticks his leg up and kicks the steel steps in Mankind’s face. Rock then grabs a chair and takes Foley’s bad knee out. As Foley uses the ropes to get to his feet Rock swings a chair at Foley but Mick ducks and the chair bounces from the rope and hits Rock in the face. Match continues and somehow ends up over the announce table, Mankind sets Rock up for a Pildriver but Rock reverses the move into a vicious looking backdrop. Referee starts the count as Mick is laid out, Rock is in the ring and Rock throws the steel steps into Mick as he lay on the floor. Back in the ring Rock hit’s the Corporate Elbow and the referee starts to count. Rocky then grabs the mic while beating down on Foley, Rocks gives us a song, but is then locked into the Mandible Claw. Match continues with both men brawling with one another, both men then grab a steel char and simultaneous knock one another out, and the referee counts both men out, to the crowds dismay, match is a draw. Overall this match was yet another superb effort by Rocky and Mick Foley, probably wasn’t as good as the match the pair had at the Royal Rumble but it wasn’t to far away and I enjoyed it very much. If that match wasn’t enough we still have Stone Cold vs. Mr. McMahon in a steel cage with the WWF title shot on the line. Ok the match kicks off with Stone Cold and a reluctant Vince McMahon who won’t get in the cage with Stone Cold. Austin goes after McMahon a few times and the two fight at ringside. Vince tries to escape by climbing the outside of the cage but Stone Cold then follows him and then McMahon falls from the cage right into the Spanish Announce table, in what looks like a horrible bump. The medics come down attend to the broken McMahon, as they cart him away, Steve Austin grabs the stretcher and throws Vince into the cage and beats him down. Back in the ring Austin has total control of the match as he beats McMahon down. Austin signals for the door to be open and he goes to walk out, as Austin looks at McMahon Vince gives Austin the middle finger sign, causing Austin to go back in the ring and beat McMahon yet again. Austin proceeds to beat Vince down, and he goes to leave the cage again but Vince give a double finger salute this time. Austin goes back into the ring and beats Vince down even more and follows it up with a Stone Cold Stunner. Soon after Paul White, a post WCW Giant and Pre WWF Big Show pops up from under the ring and attacks Austin. He throws Austin into the cage, but the cage opens up as Austin hits it and Austin manages to escape thus giving him the victory and the WWF Championship Match at Wrestlemania 15. While this match wasn’t a showcase of wrestling, it was very entertaining and McMahon took some mighty nasty bumps. The match told a good story and was highly entertaining. Overall it was good stuff from both Stone Cold and Mr. McMahon. Overall As I said this PPV was a mixed bag, it gradually got better as the show went on. The first few matches were nothing special at all, Mideon vs. Bossman was horrible and Goldust vs. Meanie wasn’t much better. The turning point of the show was the mixed tag match, which was a good effort from all four persons especially Chyna. The WWF Championship match was excellent and the cage match was very entertaining. Overall certainly worth watching, if you see this tape about I’d certainly buy it. Points : 8/10
